n. pl. beau·ties
1.
The quality that gives pleasure to the mind or senses and is associated with such properties as harmony of form or color, excellence of artistry, truthfulness, and originality.
2.
One that is beautiful, especially a beautiful woman.
What is your definition of beauty? Is it a curvy body, big eyes, a button nose and full lips? Or is it something that radiates from the inside out? Do you validate your beauty by societal means or by the male species?
I was reading this book while I was at the library, its something about being a feminist, which people think I am,but really I'm not!! ( buhahaha!)anyway it was talking about how society influences how women percieve their own beauty. The thing I hate to see young girls/women doing is trying to look good for a guy. Abeg, look good for YOURSELF. I hate to see women seeking men to approve of them and how they look, or women thinking they have to have a bigger butt or bigger breasts beacuse thats the only way they can get a man. Trust if u get a man because he noticed ur boobs or butt..u think say dat man wan relationship?! hell noooo....he wants a lil somethin somethin o! *wink* then hes gone, I dey talk true o, make una hear am...thats about modesty which is a whole noda somethin which i will most definately be talkin about later onn. Its better to embrace what you have then sit and wish that you had one thing or another. Its hard to get caught up on outward beauty and neglect our inner beauty ( which is something we should all work on daily). No one is sayin to leave the house lookin like who shot john ...but yea well u ppl know what i mean na...must elaborate sum more? lol
Everyone has insecurities, I know my biggest hang up is my chest --kai!
if u see my chest ehn...u go ask yaself, where is this girl's chest? my bust is practically non existant( im keepin hope alive that one day i will have juicy c cups hahaha!!) but I've come to except it small small na...no b beans!Other than that I've come to love other things that I like about myself, like my legs and my smile. I feel that every young girl/ woman can look in the mirror and find something they absolutely love about themselves and stop letting the media and society tell you that u need to be fair with light eyes and hair to be attractive and succesful. Lets start defining beauty in our own terms!
1. Take a look at what you like most, and play it up. Lips, eyes,cheek bones, hair whatever.
2.Never EVER compare yourself to another girl. Her beauty does not take away from yours. Shes beautiful and so are you. full stop. end of story!
3.Perfume. Smelling good helps boost your confidence...but stay away from the cheap kinds, for everyones sake :)
4.Make an effort to look good but not as if you are trying too hard.
5.Compliment a stranger at church, shcool or work. Making someone feel good just feels GOOD!
6.Wear something that you are comfortable in and that you love!
7.A little mascara, blush and lipgloss can do wonders :)
8.A smile. The best accessory that enhances a woman's beauty!
9.Kindness. Being kind is IMO more important than just being pretty. People appreciate kindness, especially random acts of kindness.
10. Be an individual. Do your own thing and you will get noticed for it. Adding personal touches like jewelry or a funky hat are things that make your style your own.
11. Invest a little ( if you have the means to do so) A bad shoe and purse are good investment pieces that last.
12. When in doubt, stick with classic pieces ( straight leg jeans,trench coats,shift dresses,cardigans).
13. LBD.Cute,sezzy & versatile.' nuff said.
14. Style your hair: I believe that certain hair stlyes bring out a woman's beauty. Chose a style that works for you and stick with it...if u want to try something different wear a wig or a weave that way you wont eff ur real hair up...
15. Dress for your body type. If you are a size 12 embrace that and stop trying to fit into a size 8.
16. Red liptick is the buisness right about now. MAC makes some nice ones. I like rooby woo, rebel ( sort of a plum color), and russian red.
17. Mystery. Having a certain mysteriousness about you always keeps em guessing. Keep em on their toes!
18. Elevator eyes are irritating mehnnn and a lot of girls seem to do it..just to see how the other girls match up...that is a definate don't. If you look good then who cares what anyone else is wearing...
19. Dont assume just because you happen to be prettier than another girl, that it automatically makes u better than her..." I'm prettier than her anyways"...ehen so, are u just a pretty face?
20. Learn to accept compliments without giving the person a nasty look or saying something like " i look like ass twice warmed over/busted/ugly/fat etc...u get my drift abi?
funny enough I dont always practice what i preach...lol woreva
stay gorgeous.
Td
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Ehen see what America has reduced us to...na wa o
Me,My sister and cousin came across this 'isle' ( if dat na wetin u wan call am) kind of shocking yet not surprising...
Monday, October 26, 2009
case of the mondays and Naija on my mind
Its an ordinary monday... nothing special about it...good news is I'm in week 8 of a 15 week semester...HALLELUJAH!!!
I been day dreaming all day about moving out of state(mostly because my aunt is so annoying like I'm ready to go), if I could I would move out of this country entirely, I'm tired mehnnnn...bills no go kill me for here, abeg!
Tell me something my people, am I weird for not liking clubs? I feel the same things happen at clubs and the scene looks the same: girls in tight skimpy clothing, guys posted up on the wall ( they probably cant even dance sef) some drunk guy/girl actin a fool, and people grinding their nasty sweaty bodies against each other....ah ah which one be dat na? Imagine going to a club every weekend seeing that, wouldnt that bore somebody? I went to a club for the frist time a couple weeks back and it was just disappointing....they say dont knock it till you try it...I've tried it o! So wetin I wan come say again?!
I guess I'll stick to house parties and going to lounges...
On a lighter note, I'm still tryin to go to Naija in January( to Lagos and I consider this my first time) I want to know some happening places jare, which places to go to shop, eat, chill woreva anyone can think of would be fine...Also what should I pack if I'm goin in Jan? hows the weather around that time sef? Looking forward to some suggestions...
I'm checkin out jare, have a fantabulous week ahead..
TD
I been day dreaming all day about moving out of state(mostly because my aunt is so annoying like I'm ready to go), if I could I would move out of this country entirely, I'm tired mehnnnn...bills no go kill me for here, abeg!
Tell me something my people, am I weird for not liking clubs? I feel the same things happen at clubs and the scene looks the same: girls in tight skimpy clothing, guys posted up on the wall ( they probably cant even dance sef) some drunk guy/girl actin a fool, and people grinding their nasty sweaty bodies against each other....ah ah which one be dat na? Imagine going to a club every weekend seeing that, wouldnt that bore somebody? I went to a club for the frist time a couple weeks back and it was just disappointing....they say dont knock it till you try it...I've tried it o! So wetin I wan come say again?!
I guess I'll stick to house parties and going to lounges...
On a lighter note, I'm still tryin to go to Naija in January( to Lagos and I consider this my first time) I want to know some happening places jare, which places to go to shop, eat, chill woreva anyone can think of would be fine...Also what should I pack if I'm goin in Jan? hows the weather around that time sef? Looking forward to some suggestions...
I'm checkin out jare, have a fantabulous week ahead..
TD
Sunday, October 25, 2009
an Uneventful Sunday
ahhh Sunday, a day to rest and worship....
Today wasnt so special, nothing really happened, just went to church and relaxed mostly. I'm a commuter so my "college life" is basically non existant and my aunt is constantly on our ( my sister,cousin and me) backs whenever we do go out...pretty annoying which makes me want to fill out some college apps sharp sharp n gerrout of here...
I been thinking about the guy I used to go out with ( I dont use 'ex' too often, idk why) because I emailed him asking him to bring my pictures back that I left at his place. I didnt say 'hi' or 'how are you? I wasnt in the mood for all that kind talk, I just want my pics o. So he ( lets call him Olu). So Olu writes back and says " Hey its been along time, I would have called you but my phone doesnt work right now. I missed your 'coolness'. I will send you your pics. ttyl'. I'm sitting there like wtf, whos really trying to conversate here with you, bring me my pics jare! I replied two days later with a simple "Thanks". Our break up was sort of messy.
*Rewind to Week of Sept.14-Oct.1*
During that week ( Sept 14) Idk something came over me, and I was always too busy or too tired to really talk to him but we managed to talk on fb and just txt. I noticed he was acting funny and wouldnt really talk as much as before. He said he had a 'cold'. I'm just like ok o, whatever you say.My friend died around the 13th...and I was sort of out of it and didnt really talk much to him. So the next couple of days we were talking and he goes...you left me for a whole week without calling etc and I've been thinking..he was beating around the bush and before I know it he said he 'had to go' after that whenever we were on the phone he would make an excuse to get off the phone. I was really trying to make it work, you know but at the same time I knew something wasnt right and I knew what he was going to tell me.So a couple days later I called him and told him to say whatever he had to say and stop beating around the bush he says ok " I dont think I can continue in a relationship with someone like you, you have a long way to go".I wasnt surprised. I asked him to just return the things I left at his place and I would do the same I hung up but I was FURIOUS. We texted back and forth and my fingers nearly burned a hole through my phone. He said we could still be friends and I said I never wanted to speak or see him again. I broke down and at this point I was feeling like my whole world was crashing... My aunt told me to take heart and be happy I didnt sleep with him..I was still upset.for about a day or so....then we started talking/txting like 'friends' he called me 'Onose' instead of 'baby' which rubbed me the wrong way and I dont know why....
Fast forward to the end of Sept. I was going for my interview at Nigeria House ( the most stupid human beings work at that place. I swear. God forgive me but they all have their heads in their azz ) and I asked him if I could stay there, I didnt have money for a hotel or whatever and I wasnt staying in Ny at the time. Needless to say it was a BIG MISTAKE O!! ha, see me see trouble ke, the guy was rude and acted like he didnt want me there. Man he was playin GAMES. Like he would be hiding ( shady as hell I tell u) to talk to some girl, like I didnt know. Im not stupid ( we had talked a week or so before about hopefully getting back together so I was clueless as to why he was talking to someone else) and after he was done with his little convo he would step to me like everything was all good. stupid mumu. I ignored him and kept doing whatever....later that night at his place he was critisizing everything I wore....from my shorts ( that I wanted to sleep in) to my shoes ( for the naija indy. party...was anyone @Blvd? d club was dull ) which he said looked like hooker shoes...at that time I was PISSED. I decided to leave him alone and browse the net.
Next day I went to the interview.
yeye man: How are we suppose to know dat yua parents are Nigerians ehn?
Whia is yua parental consent?
Me: I'm over 16, and my birth cert. states where my parents were born
ym: It doesnt matter, and you were even suppose to pay $ 112 dollas not $ 75, now go across d street and get yua refund
me: But it didnt specify that on the website
*This is when he gets hannoyed ( lol)*
ym:Look this is what I'm tellin you! forgret about what dey said on the website. This is what I'm telling you.( ha!!! see me see wahala wetin i do this man nau?)
Anyway have a nice day, tank jyou ( maybe he was benin or yoruba idk for him )for coming today.
I bounced ourra that place mehnnn.... didnt get my refund and basically wasted my time.
Back to Olu. I got back to his place and he said he was going to the gym. I bacially stayed on his computer all day and napped. Later at night I started typing my paper that was due the next day and he was complaining about that too ( ughh!) I finally finished and before that I told him we needed to talk. He was already asleep and when I got to bed he says " So what do you need to talk about"? I said nevermind he shrugged and turned over , went to sleep. I then started talking about how hes been making me feel bad , like he didnt want me there. He denied everything. And I turned over and stopped talking. He turned over and told me to come close to him, his face was getting closer to mine. We kissed and fooled around and he even asked me " you wanna have sex"? I said no and he said we should stop what we were doing. We went to bed , but that question was quite strange . since he said we were friends and knows I was going to say no.
The day of the Indy parade:
I woke up to his voice, but he was on the phone ( yea at 8am) obviously it was with a girl and its like he made sure I was around to hear him, this stupid boy really wanted to hurt me...So i ignored him and went about my business and took my shower etc. When i went to brush my teeth he started hiding in the kitchen talking to this girl, I pretended like I didnt see him and kept it moving. We got dressed and picked up his friends ( 2 of them) and took the train to the parade. He was using all kinds of dumb slangs and swears to make himself sound cool in front of his friends....he looked like a fool because they werent even paying him attention. On the train he was doin the same shit. He was hiding to talk to this girl and basically IGNORED me. I packed my shit and moved to another seat he later comes and asks me if I was ok. I told him I was on the phone and . As soon as the train stopped,I hopped off and went my own way...I wanted to just give him one to the jaw.......After that episode, now I knw his true colors...and I'm glad that I didnt sleep with him ( maybe thats what got him fustrated) what do u think?
to be continued ( ive written too much sef)
have a wonderful sunday!
♥ TD
Today wasnt so special, nothing really happened, just went to church and relaxed mostly. I'm a commuter so my "college life" is basically non existant and my aunt is constantly on our ( my sister,cousin and me) backs whenever we do go out...pretty annoying which makes me want to fill out some college apps sharp sharp n gerrout of here...
I been thinking about the guy I used to go out with ( I dont use 'ex' too often, idk why) because I emailed him asking him to bring my pictures back that I left at his place. I didnt say 'hi' or 'how are you? I wasnt in the mood for all that kind talk, I just want my pics o. So he ( lets call him Olu). So Olu writes back and says " Hey its been along time, I would have called you but my phone doesnt work right now. I missed your 'coolness'. I will send you your pics. ttyl'. I'm sitting there like wtf, whos really trying to conversate here with you, bring me my pics jare! I replied two days later with a simple "Thanks". Our break up was sort of messy.
*Rewind to Week of Sept.14-Oct.1*
During that week ( Sept 14) Idk something came over me, and I was always too busy or too tired to really talk to him but we managed to talk on fb and just txt. I noticed he was acting funny and wouldnt really talk as much as before. He said he had a 'cold'. I'm just like ok o, whatever you say.My friend died around the 13th...and I was sort of out of it and didnt really talk much to him. So the next couple of days we were talking and he goes...you left me for a whole week without calling etc and I've been thinking..he was beating around the bush and before I know it he said he 'had to go' after that whenever we were on the phone he would make an excuse to get off the phone. I was really trying to make it work, you know but at the same time I knew something wasnt right and I knew what he was going to tell me.So a couple days later I called him and told him to say whatever he had to say and stop beating around the bush he says ok " I dont think I can continue in a relationship with someone like you, you have a long way to go".I wasnt surprised. I asked him to just return the things I left at his place and I would do the same I hung up but I was FURIOUS. We texted back and forth and my fingers nearly burned a hole through my phone. He said we could still be friends and I said I never wanted to speak or see him again. I broke down and at this point I was feeling like my whole world was crashing... My aunt told me to take heart and be happy I didnt sleep with him..I was still upset.for about a day or so....then we started talking/txting like 'friends' he called me 'Onose' instead of 'baby' which rubbed me the wrong way and I dont know why....
Fast forward to the end of Sept. I was going for my interview at Nigeria House ( the most stupid human beings work at that place. I swear. God forgive me but they all have their heads in their azz ) and I asked him if I could stay there, I didnt have money for a hotel or whatever and I wasnt staying in Ny at the time. Needless to say it was a BIG MISTAKE O!! ha, see me see trouble ke, the guy was rude and acted like he didnt want me there. Man he was playin GAMES. Like he would be hiding ( shady as hell I tell u) to talk to some girl, like I didnt know. Im not stupid ( we had talked a week or so before about hopefully getting back together so I was clueless as to why he was talking to someone else) and after he was done with his little convo he would step to me like everything was all good. stupid mumu. I ignored him and kept doing whatever....later that night at his place he was critisizing everything I wore....from my shorts ( that I wanted to sleep in) to my shoes ( for the naija indy. party...was anyone @Blvd? d club was dull ) which he said looked like hooker shoes...at that time I was PISSED. I decided to leave him alone and browse the net.
Next day I went to the interview.
yeye man: How are we suppose to know dat yua parents are Nigerians ehn?
Whia is yua parental consent?
Me: I'm over 16, and my birth cert. states where my parents were born
ym: It doesnt matter, and you were even suppose to pay $ 112 dollas not $ 75, now go across d street and get yua refund
me: But it didnt specify that on the website
*This is when he gets hannoyed ( lol)*
ym:Look this is what I'm tellin you! forgret about what dey said on the website. This is what I'm telling you.( ha!!! see me see wahala wetin i do this man nau?)
Anyway have a nice day, tank jyou ( maybe he was benin or yoruba idk for him )for coming today.
I bounced ourra that place mehnnn.... didnt get my refund and basically wasted my time.
Back to Olu. I got back to his place and he said he was going to the gym. I bacially stayed on his computer all day and napped. Later at night I started typing my paper that was due the next day and he was complaining about that too ( ughh!) I finally finished and before that I told him we needed to talk. He was already asleep and when I got to bed he says " So what do you need to talk about"? I said nevermind he shrugged and turned over , went to sleep. I then started talking about how hes been making me feel bad , like he didnt want me there. He denied everything. And I turned over and stopped talking. He turned over and told me to come close to him, his face was getting closer to mine. We kissed and fooled around and he even asked me " you wanna have sex"? I said no and he said we should stop what we were doing. We went to bed , but that question was quite strange . since he said we were friends and knows I was going to say no.
The day of the Indy parade:
I woke up to his voice, but he was on the phone ( yea at 8am) obviously it was with a girl and its like he made sure I was around to hear him, this stupid boy really wanted to hurt me...So i ignored him and went about my business and took my shower etc. When i went to brush my teeth he started hiding in the kitchen talking to this girl, I pretended like I didnt see him and kept it moving. We got dressed and picked up his friends ( 2 of them) and took the train to the parade. He was using all kinds of dumb slangs and swears to make himself sound cool in front of his friends....he looked like a fool because they werent even paying him attention. On the train he was doin the same shit. He was hiding to talk to this girl and basically IGNORED me. I packed my shit and moved to another seat he later comes and asks me if I was ok. I told him I was on the phone and . As soon as the train stopped,I hopped off and went my own way...I wanted to just give him one to the jaw.......After that episode, now I knw his true colors...and I'm glad that I didnt sleep with him ( maybe thats what got him fustrated) what do u think?
to be continued ( ive written too much sef)
have a wonderful sunday!
♥ TD
Currently lusting after:
The sequined blazer is from tibi and the booties are from Elizabeth and James. All from shopbop.com
Expensive sha, but I must find a way... ;-)
Just added a few....hmm b like say dat Chanel purse wont be for anoda 5 years :)
Saturday, October 24, 2009
introduction....almost forgot! tee hee
How could I forget to introduce myself?! I'm just going to make a list of the things the represent me...
Haha ok, here it goes:
I am THE DAMSEL ( haha) I call myself THE DAMSEL because deep down I like to pretend that I am one, and most girls always try to pull the damsel in distress thing...not me sha I've never done it but it seems fun to try...
I'm Nigerian American, therfore I have the utmost right to say all the :wanna,ganna,shanna,unnas that I want :)
I wish I grew up in Naija... more cousins= double the fun!!
I havent been to Nigeria since I was 1 ( for my bday)
I fit yarn pidgin ( surprise surprise not every Naija person born in America is clueless hahaha)
Broke college student trying to get into too many things: law,broadcast journalism, buisness,philanthropy...ahh
I claim my Nigerian side more so than my American, but I'm proud to be both.
I'm tall ( just 5'10) but my siblings are all way taller over 6 ft
I have a HUGE family, some of them I havent met, looking foreward to that
I'm a 90's baby!!
I'm a gemini, abi na cancer??? woreva...
I LOVE Nigeria, theres no other country I would rather come from, I take the good with the bad. I mean look @ us mehn...we too much sef everything we do we do am well well. Did you know that Nigerians are the most educated immigrants in the United States? 'NUFF SAID jare....
Trying to start a charity and hold drives for:clothing,shoes,glasses etc and send them to Nigeria, I also want to send basic hygiene products.
Intrested in learning yoruba ( any lessons??)and igbo. I know my language ( a little) but I'm intrested in other languages
Planning to do Nysc after law school ( if i go) and make a change in Nigeria, lots of us complain about Nigeria but never want to do anything about it. Lets be the change we want to see and stop talking....too much talking is a waste of breath :-D
Love fashion, not into trends. I do love vintage and online shops shaaa....
I love lipstick and unique jewelry
Ankara
I love me some BADDDD ass shoess!
Sunglasses...- life savers especially when u hit that airport looking like the corpse bride
Love traveling ( although i havent really been anywhere :( but this America is getting dull so I must explore other places.
Naija movies
and Ogbono soup ( dat na d soup from my state o!)
Love reading and writing and all that stuff
I don talk my own, make i commot here,
have a wonderful afternoon,morning or evening,
TD
Haha ok, here it goes:
I am THE DAMSEL ( haha) I call myself THE DAMSEL because deep down I like to pretend that I am one, and most girls always try to pull the damsel in distress thing...not me sha I've never done it but it seems fun to try...
I'm Nigerian American, therfore I have the utmost right to say all the :wanna,ganna,shanna,unnas that I want :)
I wish I grew up in Naija... more cousins= double the fun!!
I havent been to Nigeria since I was 1 ( for my bday)
I fit yarn pidgin ( surprise surprise not every Naija person born in America is clueless hahaha)
Broke college student trying to get into too many things: law,broadcast journalism, buisness,philanthropy...ahh
I claim my Nigerian side more so than my American, but I'm proud to be both.
I'm tall ( just 5'10) but my siblings are all way taller over 6 ft
I have a HUGE family, some of them I havent met, looking foreward to that
I'm a 90's baby!!
I'm a gemini, abi na cancer??? woreva...
I LOVE Nigeria, theres no other country I would rather come from, I take the good with the bad. I mean look @ us mehn...we too much sef everything we do we do am well well. Did you know that Nigerians are the most educated immigrants in the United States? 'NUFF SAID jare....
Trying to start a charity and hold drives for:clothing,shoes,glasses etc and send them to Nigeria, I also want to send basic hygiene products.
Intrested in learning yoruba ( any lessons??)and igbo. I know my language ( a little) but I'm intrested in other languages
Planning to do Nysc after law school ( if i go) and make a change in Nigeria, lots of us complain about Nigeria but never want to do anything about it. Lets be the change we want to see and stop talking....too much talking is a waste of breath :-D
Love fashion, not into trends. I do love vintage and online shops shaaa....
I love lipstick and unique jewelry
Ankara
I love me some BADDDD ass shoess!
Sunglasses...- life savers especially when u hit that airport looking like the corpse bride
Love traveling ( although i havent really been anywhere :( but this America is getting dull so I must explore other places.
Naija movies
and Ogbono soup ( dat na d soup from my state o!)
Love reading and writing and all that stuff
I don talk my own, make i commot here,
have a wonderful afternoon,morning or evening,
TD
hmmm...
Very random but im worried about my cousin o. He is 3 years old and OBSESSED with girls and their underwear, he even tries to look under my sisters towel after she comes out of the shower. I think this is the making of a pervert...ewww! I am thinking we should tell his mom, Idk if his mom will even believe that one oh...I'm not sure what to do...any advice?
ANYWAY what is everyone talking about sex and marriage for?The other week my auntie was giving my sister a lecture about it now that she is 21, can you imagine, @ 21 we are still wild, young and free jare, which 1 be marriage marriage... I dont really see my self getting married...Ok let me stop lying....i do but the prospects are lookin low....every guy now a days just wants slam bam thank you ma'am...nobody wants a girl with morals anymore jo. They want the girls who are willing to do anything then they say they want to marry a virgin afterwards... Guys who place a double standard on sex are the ones who I have already VOWED to stay away from.
Why is purity so emphasized for girls but with guys its almost a sin to be a virgin....i sure say guy virgins no dey dis earth again....
im ourra here,
TD
ANYWAY what is everyone talking about sex and marriage for?The other week my auntie was giving my sister a lecture about it now that she is 21, can you imagine, @ 21 we are still wild, young and free jare, which 1 be marriage marriage... I dont really see my self getting married...Ok let me stop lying....i do but the prospects are lookin low....every guy now a days just wants slam bam thank you ma'am...nobody wants a girl with morals anymore jo. They want the girls who are willing to do anything then they say they want to marry a virgin afterwards... Guys who place a double standard on sex are the ones who I have already VOWED to stay away from.
Why is purity so emphasized for girls but with guys its almost a sin to be a virgin....i sure say guy virgins no dey dis earth again....
im ourra here,
TD
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